Pause….for your world will wait when you are ready

Boss: Know no bounds

(The blog for the aspiring novice entrepreneur boss)

Pause….for your world will wait when you are ready

It wouldn’t be real if I never blogged about sh*tty moments & how there will be circumstances when you want to revert into your cocoon.

This has been a weird week full of mixed emotions. Loss…grief…anger…all very real emotions & all too difficult to blog out. So today, I am going to talk about pausing.

In my world, “to pause” and stop is a very foreign & rare concept in my life. If you know me well, I am constantly on the go, I am always brewing up ideas, & I am always busy. I half jokingly tell my friends that I really don’t know how to relax. That fast pace momentum has always been my lifestyle choice (Yes, I’ve come to terms that the busy-ness I choose is a choice).

In my last blog post, I wrote about “Keep going for the world will keep on truckin”. While my life philosophies centre around the need to “persist through life’s challenges”& that “life waits for no one”, there are many instances when life will throw you curveballs & defy those philosophies. These past few weeks, my go-go-go pace was intersected by the reality that humans are not immortal. Loss can strike a real chord in you, even when it isn’t directly your loss. A family’s loss is also a loss for you.

Hitting that “pause” button is much needed in times of loss. Mindfulness and intentional pausing is tough because it requires the art of tuning out the background noise while being fully aware of your internal sensations. A big part of it is also giving yourself permission to carve out time to “just be” without an agenda or the need to meet a deadline, or the need to be or give to someone else. Mindfulness & self-care is purely about YOU.

I have done a lot of self-reflection this past week and integrating more alone time than typically. In relation to my journey as a novice entrepreneur, this time of reflection has done wanders. People were not kidding when they say that some of their great works has come from places of sadness & darkness. Think of the greatest love songs; many which were created during heartbreak &  mourning. These past few weeks, I have been inspired from artfully curated quotes I’ve seen on other social media feeds that resonate within my heart, I’ve worked on putting emotions onto paper (through various mediums ranging from writing, drawing, & colouring), & openly shared some of my new found perspectives.

This week I have no tips for the novice entrepreneur; just purely insights that have come my way this past week.  Recognizing life lessons and facing reality is still part of that journey as a small business owner, regardless if it is directly related to your business. But one thing I take away from this whole concept of pausing is this: when your world gets sad & hopeless, look to others who can shed a shred of light in your world. For there is so much good and hope in the world and within others. Others can be your strength until you are ready. Sometimes that place of pain can ignite richness (within others & within you) that you never knew could be. And while, inevitably, the world will continue to move on around you, take all the time you need to pause, for your world (& all the people that make up your world) will wait for you when you are ready.

Motivation of the week: The hope & belief that time can heal all wounds; and that strength & resilience is built from difficulties & pain.

Always me,

SoireeFrillsCo.

Boss-in-training: No-no bounds

(The blog for my growing girls, who I strive to raise strong fierce ladies & soon-to-be bosses- The ‘don’ts’, followed by the ‘do’s’)

Pause. Stop. Breathe. Live.

Dear Elle & Enne,

Pause. Stop. Breathe. Live. Sometimes momma needs a reminder herself to do all these things. And perhaps, this is something you can remind me every now and then in my hustle bustle lifestyle.

During those long endless days when I am exhausted & crave for easier days to come when the two of you grow up, I am reminded time & time again that I really don’t want you to grow up. I love those chubby cheeks and tiny toes and tiny fingers and those coos only reserved for mama. Even today when I look at baby photos of you, I miss how tiny you were.

But I know that isn’t reality. You can’t stay babies forever. You will grow up, whether I am ready to accept it or not.

So today, my advice for the both of you is this: Don’t let others rush you into things. Don’t allow others dictate to you that you have to make a decision right then & there. Don’t grow up too quickly; for you have the rest of your life to be an adult. Pause when you need a moment; stop when you need a break. Breathe in a fresh of breath air; Live in the moment. It is the time that you have now.

Love, Mom



Keep on truckin’ for traffic ain’t stoppin’

Boss: Know no bounds

(The blog for the aspiring novice entrepreneur boss)

Keep on truckin’ for traffic ain’t stoppin’

Life is hard, life is messy, and I guarantee you there will be roadblocks that get in the way of you getting to where you want to. But one thing I’ve learnt for sure is that if you truly want your business to keep on going, then you as a business owner must also keep on going. If you don’t go ahead and keep doing what you do and/ or do what you love, then someone else is gonna be doing what you wanna do instead of you.

Fatigue, sleepless nights with the kiddos, hectic work days at my other work gig, & need to balance other personal goals (at this stage in life anyway) precedes my side hustle. It’s hard to maintain focus or momentum when attention or progress seems fragmented.

One thing that keeps me going is the encouragement & re-enforcement I encounter from others when I complete a craft project. While I am often a person of intrinsic motivation, the external sources  of motivation is my injection of momentum that propels me forward when the going gets tough. However, I know fully well that extrinsic sources of motivation can only go so far. According to Wikipedia (I currently do not have a list of scientific articles at the snap of my fingers; though that is on my bucket list), extrinsic motivation is defined as the performance of activity to achieve a desired external outcome, such as  obtaining a reward or prize (ie. Cleaning the house to get allowance money). On the other hand, intrinsic motivation is the end result of doing something to obtain a positive inner feeling (ie. Helping someone because it gives you a “fuzzy feel-good feeling”).

Here are some tips I use to ignite those intrinsic sources of motivation (in other words, these are the outcomes I keep in mind to help me get through those moments whenI wanna give up):

  1. Getting sh*t generally feels good, therefore I try to keep that mantra that if I do It (whatever I set myself to do), I will feel better.
  2. Remind myself that when I don’t take the moments to craft as my down time, I feel like I haven’t had “me time”. No “me time” equates to feeling exhausted; & I need that extra surge of activity to feel productive in my life.
  3. Keep myself accountable by ensuring I have products or content to post on my social media accounts.
  4. I automatically feel better about the monies I spent on craft items if I actually use them; therefore I often tell myself that I’ll feel more justified in my purchase if I craft with that item. This usually gets me pretty excited!
  5. I picture where I want to be; and remind myself that small amounts of daily efforts will go a long way in the bigger scheme of things. This visualization of my future self is often enough to get me going…of course along with a dose of coffee !
  6. The frequent reminders that life is full of hardships & that it is okay to hit those little curveballs. I allow myself a day (or maybe two) days of pity parties and then I tell myself it’s time to move on.
  7. 7. Remind myself that if I don’t get on the train, the train will leave without out me.

Sometimes putting in a good movie; or listening to motivating music gets me going. Next blog post will be my top resources I use that helps me propel forward.

Motivation of the week: Coupons. Awesome coupons have been popping up at Michaels. But in order for me to justify buying more crafts, I tell myself that I have to use what I currently have.

Always me,

SoireeFrillsCo.

Boss-in-training: No-no bounds

(The blog for my growing girls, who I strive to raise strong fierce ladies & soon-to-be bosses- The ‘don’ts’, followed by the ‘do’s’)

Don’t get stuck in that muck

Dear Elle & Enne,

You will encounter hiccups; you will hit roadblocks; there will moments when you wanna give up. There will be people who tell you “No” & there will be instances when you start having self-doubt . The toughest is when you start doubting yourself.  I dread the day when either of you come home and tell me that you have given up. I hope that with hard work & perseverance, you will see that hard work pays off.

Don’t ever let yourself to believe that you can’t do something; don’t let that negative voice shadow your abilities and goals. Will it get hard? Yes. Will there be days that will exhaust you emotionally & physically? Absolutely. Are there gonna be days when you wanna throw in the towel? For sure. But the best part about persevering and pushing through is the sweet taste of accomplishment after the sweat & tears.

Growing up, the best quote I ever heard about hardship was this: “And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through…you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about”- Haruki Murakami.

You will hit many storms throughout your lifetime; obviously some calmer than others. May you embrace the challenges, may you embrace the rain, for nothing in this life is easy. So keep on going….And as long as I’m your mother, I will always try to make you see the rainbows out of every rainfall and storm.

Love, Mom

Time: Managing the circus act

Boss: Know no bounds

(The blog for the aspiring novice entrepreneur boss)

 Time: Managing the circus act

When you are a mom, you become a professional juggler. You are a mom, chauffeur, referee, counselor, chef, engineer, and housemaid (I’m sure I missed a few)  all rolled into one for those cute little earthlings called your children. When you have additional roles & responsibilities outside of your home, the circus act becomes even more chaotic.

As a mother of two young children who is also starting up her small business, I can’t emphasize enough the fact that time management is crucial,…but you also have to be a ‘flow as you go’ type of individual. Believe me, it’s great to have plans and times carved out for certain tasks to be completed; but there will be many MANY moments when your child will unexpectedly get up in the middle of the night for various reasons, which will require mom to stay with them for the entire night.  Or there will be days when they just won’t take that 1-2 hour nap, the exact timeframe you have allocated to do something for yourself. For a multitude of reasons, your plans will occasionally (okay, who are we kidding!! It’s frequently) go on the wayside when you are a mom. Sometimes it’s a miracle when you have been able to shower, eat your own meal from your own plate, & be dressed in stain-free clothes, all in one day.

As I digress from the real topic at hand, I feel like time management has been my main recipe for succeeding as a novice entrepreneur who also happens to be a mom of 2 young children. With that being said, time management as an entrepreneur with 2 kiddos (for me) involves the following:

  1. Use every spare moment to be productive– When I have at least 15 minutes of spare time, I capitalize on this free time. Whether checking or replying back to an email, writing down some ideas, or collecting all tools/ supplies for a specific task, I use those spare minutes.During my lunch hours on my main work gig, I will often utilize that time to do something related to homelife, SoireeFrillsCo., or personal life. If I can pick up groceries during a moment when the kids aren’t with me, I take it. If I can respond to emails during that brief free moment, that means it frees up time to do another task the next time I have a free 10- 15 minute moment. As you can imagine, I am always on the go and will often eat lunch while running to do another task. Even throughout dinner, when the kids are settled and have their meals in front of them, I celebrate those 5 minutes of quiet time by loading up the dishwasher.

It is amazing how much of a time saver it is when I use pockets of time throughout the day; because a parent, you very rarely have long stretches of free time (and may I add, free time without the kids hanging on to your legs, lol) …and when you do have free time (which is typically at the end of the day when the kiddos are fast asleep), you are more apt to go to bed too. When I have those tempting moments to just crash in front of the TV at the end of the night, I just think of how great it feels after I have contributed time towards my small business. I am not an idler, nor do I like to waste time. I make every minute count, because time is valuable.  I like to think that I will never get the time back, so may as well make the most out it.  Give me 15 minutes and I can accomplish a ton!

  1. Write it down & create lists- I am forever a list maker, writer, & journaler. I have been this way since I can remember. I love sticky notes, pens, journals, & notebooks. There is nothing more satisfying than crossing out a completed task from your ‘to-do’ list. I also love to compartmentalize things…aka categorizing things. I have separate lists for: meal ideas, grocery lists, fitness activities, work-related schedules, school related tasks & deadlines, home chores, and kids activities. It is no wonder (as a compartmentalizer) that I feel the need to have separate notebooks/ lists for each area of my life.

If it gets written, down, you are committed to it. Also, when it gets written down, it is more likely to happen versus if it was just floating around in your brain waiting to materialize.

I also love to post these lists on the fridge or on white eraser boards for everyone to see at home. Not only is it a great visual reminder for me, but it also gives a visual cue for everyone in your family as to what is on your list of things to do (particularly for meal plans, grocery lists, & family activities).

  1. Junk drawer & dump book- I always have a million ideas milling around in my mind. Many of which are focused on tasks that need to be done to “survive” the day. So it has been helpful for me to have a random “dumpbook” that I carry with me so that anytime I have a fleeting idea related to my business infiltrate my mind, I am able to immediately write it down before the idea slips from my mind. I can then always revert back to this dumpbook & organize my business ideas when I have a larger chunk of time to process my ideas.

I also find that I will stumble upon ‘brain blocks’ so sometimes having a dump book to explore my creative juices produce clarity in a specific project. Having a random art journal is so neat to look back as it has served as a process tool for my projects.

  1. Allocate the anticipated time & multiply by three; you will definitely need that extra time- My rule of thumb: if something takes half an hour to complete something, you need to allocate an additional hour on top. Remember when I said there will be unexpected occurrences that pop up when you are a parent? 99% of the time, something you did not expect to happen will come up…guaranteed! So if you have that grace time period, you are setting yourself up for success. This always works for me. As a perk, if you finish the project task well before the allocated time, consider that free extra time for you to do something else.
  1. Combine multiple tasks to be efficient- The greatest advice I ever received from a girlfriend was way back when before I had children. She said, she will often wipe down or dust the walls as she is going up & down the stairs whenever she grabs an item. You have no idea how many times this rings true now as a parent. Whenever I need to go an area of the house (be it the basement, laundry room, upstairs, kids’ rooms) I will often think ‘what items d o I need to put away in that room?”. If I am going by the sink, I will often wash a few dishes that need washing if I have a few free moments. Sometimes its about doing things in small chewable chunks as opposed to doing it in its entirety.

Whenever I want to get in a great workout but don’t have time to go to the gym, I will intentionally choose an activity that will force me to be active. For example, my favourite activity is to take the kids sledding. The kids love it, I get a hella workout, and then we all are exhausted afterwards, which means a lengthy naptime. WIN/ WIN!!

Playdates with other girlfriends with kids are also the bomb. You squeeze in social catch up time with social activity for the kiddos.

Gotta love it when you accomplish two goals all in one.

  1. Take time for self-care

I cannot stress the importance of self-care enough. Self-care should have been my number one point. When I was first initially starting to practice to art of self-care as a newbie mother, I would often have to talk myself out of the unending guilt I felt for being away from the kids. I felt sheepish for wanting to go get my hair done & highlighted (which meant me being away for 3-4 hours away from the kiddos).

What I’ve come to realize though is that you can only be as good as a caregiver to others if you are a good caregiver to yourself. I am quite convinced that the more I take care of myself, the more energy I have to look after my family &do the things I love. I also notice that when I feel my best,  the more creative ideas come to me. The more I do the things I love, the more I want to do. Go figure ; the irony is that the busier I am, the more I want to do.  Managing my self-care has not only served me well in my personal life; but it has done amazing things for my business. Improved self-care has proven to lead to increased productivity in my world (as I am sure that has been shown in research studies….more to come on that one).

  1. Embrace the messiness– I have always grown up associating fun with messy. I’ve also believed that the funner something is, the messier it is. My crafting is a testament to that. Whenever I am crafting up a storm, my house looks like a tornado just came through. Life with kids is also a hundred times messier than my pre-kids stage. As soon as I tidy something up, it is bound to get messy or rummaged through within 5 minutes…guaranteed. So one of my key ingredients to being a craft creator as a mom..is embrace the messiness. Yes, there will always be dishes to wash; yes, the laundry will continue to pile up (OMG…do you know how much clothes a pre-schooler and a toddler go through??); so may as well enjoy the moments when you can when you can have FUN, especially when it comes to spending time with the kids. The dishes & laundry can wait another day….and in my world, sometimes it’s doing the laundry when they are out of clean socks or pants. Who else can relate to me??

One of my life mantras is ‘life is messy; so embrace the messiness”. It has definitely served as a tool to enjoy life with the kids while building my small empire.

Always me, SoireeFrillsCo.

Motivation of the week: Laughter. There has been many challenging moments this past week that caused utter frustration; but laughter & laughing it off (when I got to that level) made me get through those moments.. .And of course my wonderful support system, who made ‘laughing it off’ so much more bearable J

Boss-in-training: No-no bounds

(The blog for my growing girls, who I strive to raise strong fierce ladies & soon-to-be-bosses- The don’ts, followed by the ‘do’s’)

Don’t expend energy on the things that don’t give you ‘all the feels’

Being a kid is all about fun! And FUN is the major ingredient to anything in this world.

-Who do you love hanging out with? The people you have fun with!

-What kinds of activities do you pursue? The ones that you love doing!

-What facilitates best learning? The fun learning experiences that allow freedom to explore.

-How does one maintain a regimented routine? When enjoyment is integrated in that schedule.

I am a strong believer that fun is the root & essence to most (if not all) things in this world. Am I saying that life is all about fun? No, not all….though what I am saying is that success in anything in this world exponentially increases when the concept of fun is woven into the goal.

I want my girls to know that anything in possible; and that impossibility can be attainable with hard work and when the efforts come from the heart. But what comes with hard work is overcoming barriers; and if you aren’t having fun in the process while hurdling through those inevitable challenges (because there will always be challenges to anything), life can become pretty dreary. And life is already hard as it is without the extra layer of dreariness.

As a personal side bar, I remember sending my daughter to ballet lessons…and she didn’t enjoy it. But I kept pushing on with it, thinking that ‘ yes, she will learn to enjoy it and one day she will enjoy coming here’…and I kept convincing myself that this was for her own good.  Eight weeks in, I noticed she still didn’t take a liking to ballet. But one day, they did a spontaneous bootcamp, sporty drill as a side activity; and she looooooved it. She was laughing, trying all the different stations, and talking so much more. I hadn’t seen that since starting those classes. It was then I learned a valuable lesson; I had made these ballet classes all about me (even though I kept telling myself it was for her); but really, I should be encouraging her to do the activities she loves; as opposed to signing her up for activities that I had envisioned her to love. From then on, I learned to only encourage activities that make her squeal with glee.

I want both my girls to know that life can be (and should be) fun while pursuing a dream…and if you are lucky, your goal/ dream can be all rewarding, fulfilling, and enjoyable.

Dear Elle & Enne,

What I love about childhood & youth is the innocence & fun that exudes from everything that you both are & everything you do. When I watch you explore and learn, I am always mesmerized at the light I see in your eyes and the pure amazement that comes from your faces. There is something to be said about wanting to pause moments in time so that I can freeze those overwhelmingly awesome emotions forever!

Don’t expend energy on the things that don’t give you ‘all the feels’…and what your cool mom is trying to say is this….love with your whole heart, do with your entire being, and pursue all things that make you happy. There is nothing more a mother wants more for her children than to see them be successful in what brings them joy

I will forever be your number one fan; and if there is something you want to pursue, be it small or big, I will be right there next to you holding your hand cheering you o.

Love, Mom

Relationships 101: People need people

Boss: Know no bounds

Relationships 101: People need people

I love being a sole owner of my own small company. I like to have the final say in what projects I pursue, how I spend my time, and how projects are executed. Don’t get me wrong, I am a team player and I love doing for others; but when all other areas of my life are doing for others and doing with others, a part of me loves that sense of full control over the brand of Soiree Frills Co.

With that being said, I can’t expand a company just on my own. As a small business owner, I am only as successful as I have customers who invest in me & purchase my products and services. (It’s the same concept as celebrities saying to their fans in their awards speech that they are where they are because of the fans they have).

Having relationships with your customers and having a network is one of the key ingredients in marketing who you are as a small business. Word of mouth, social media platforms, attending craft events, and opportunities to engage with other small businesses are just a few key examples of successful marketing strategies.

Building business partnerships on a larger scale is one of my 2017 goals. This seems like a daunting task at hand, especially when business building is new territory for me. But if I keep the basic foundation skills of building relationships in mind, then those basic skills will carry me through the journey of enhancing business partnerships.

Strategies to build & strengthen relationships:

Listen. Listen to what the person wants. You, as a small business, obviously offers something that they want; they are coming to you for a reason. People want to be heard, especially when they are given an opportunity to plan an event, have a say in the decision-making process, & have a voice. Listen, as it provides an opportunity for them to be centre stage during their main act. Most people love it when full attention is theirs, especially when the celebration is all about them.

Remember the small details. Listening and hearing is one step; but remembering the content of that information is the other half of that same coin. As a small craft business, knowing the customer’s personality style is essential.Knowing the type of celebration party they are hosting is also an important detail.  Is it a big fancy, milestone gala in a big reception hall?Or is it a more intimate gathering with close friends in a favourite restaurant? Perhaps they are looking for a personalized & unique gift for a loved one. Is it for a special occasion or achievement? Is the gift a symbol of their love?

Yes, these details matter. Tailoring party décor & individual gifts based on the customers’ personality, party theme, & colour motifs are what makes any celebration special.

Capitalize on future opportunities with that same customer and their network. When you make people feel special, they are more likely to come back to you for future events. People will have other birthday parties/ celebration parties, so capitalize on future opportunities. Do your best with every event & transaction you engage in. Beautiful work never goes unnoticed; and it is amazing what people remember. Word of mouth is still one of the most powerful marketing strategies & referrals from friends & families are a simple way of expanding your customer base.

Go above & beyond the initial request. People appreciate it when they get something ‘extra’ on top of what they were looking for. For example, I love it when I get freebies with an order. I also love it when I get personalized cards with an order. Therefore, I follow suit as a small business owner. When you go above and beyond (obviously within realistic parameters as a small business), customers will remember that about you. That is what will set you apart from the rest.

Execute & deliver. Talk the talk; but also walk the walk. Say what you do; and do what you say. This will add to your credibility, reliability, & trustworthiness of your small business.

Invite yourself to networking events. Don’t always wait for an invitation. Mingle with like-minded people and businesses. Informal chats are the best way to build relationships. Seek out these opportunities independently. And if you ever feel awkward about just showing up to an event on your own (especially if you are the sole owner of your own small business), pretend and believe you belong there. Afterall, you are boss; and bosses get to do what they want when they want how they want.

Always me, SoireeFrillsCo.

Motivation of the week: Coffee. And more coffee. Particularly on those nights when I am working on my craft projects…Plus I’ve had some really great conversations this week over coffee. Hence, the coffee picture above.

Boss-in-training: No-no bounds

Tribe vibes

Having relationships is important. Relationships ( whether with family members, peers you go to school with or work with) build the foundation of your support network. Having a tribe you can vibe with  makes life healthier, and funner. And we all need a lot of healthy and fun in our life. Sharing experiences and our successes throughout the lifespan is what makes life memorable.

Don’t get caught up with the wrong crowd. Don’t hang out with people that plant doubt in your hearts,  tear your dreams down, or make you do things that you do not want to do. People that do these things are toxic; and there is no room for toxic in leading a healthy life.

Surround yourself with people that make you feel good; make friends with people who have similar aspirations and interests as you. Find your tribe that makes you laugh & smile.

Cultivate the relationships that are healthy for you, for they are the ones that feed positivity into your soul. Be kind to others, and remember that relationships need nourishing to maintain its livelihood.  Receive, but also give back. Be heard, but also listen.  Take action, but also be present. True friends will be there in good times & in bad times; and so must you be there too.

Dear Elle & Enne,

I love watching you both play with your friends on the playground from a distance. I know I see you everyday but when I catch you in those moments when you do not know I am there, I see you both in a different light. I love how you both have made friends. And I love hearing your daily stories about what you did with your friends. You are both learning so much from the peers you see everyday. This playground is your first glimpse into the playground of life.

I want you to make life-long friends with people that make you laugh silly; kind of like how you are when I am secretly watching you on the playground at school. Your friends are an extension of you and they will play a vital role in life. You will soon learn one day that not everyone is kind all of the time. The world can be unfair & cruel. But happiness can be found amidst the harsh reality that life throws us. It’s the people we share moments with that make life beautiful.  I wish to see you cultivate healthy relationships with people that support you, be kind to you, & want to hang out with you because they like you for you. Friends are the people that make you want  to be a better person; they are  your cheerleading squad. I have been lucky enough to be friends with many of the same peeps for over 10- 20 years  who have stood by my side through many life milestones. I wish that you are as lucky to find friends that become family; just as I have been fortunate in friendships.

Love, Mom

See to seize, survive and thrive.

Boss: Know no bounds

See to seize, survive and thrive

Entering the world of an aspiring entrepreneur is such a foreign world to me. While I am still doing a lot of learning, these past 4 years (since starting this side hustle), has been quite the adventure. Just like any new learning experience, it’s a wild ride you are not too sure if you want to stay on or get off.

Lucky for me, I have always thrived in the unknown (strangely enough, not in the ‘go into a haunted house’ type of thrill) but more of a ‘ dive into a ridiculous situation & hope I float’) type of way.

As a newbie in the world of being an aspiring entrepreneur, it is certainly emphasized that you have to be willing to take a risk; and you have to believe in your abilities to succeed….even when you aren’t too sure of yourself.  The old adage saying “Fake it till you make it” is what gets me through those moments where I have gotten discouraged in this learning process. That mantra is what gets me through times that lack clarity or when the thoughts of self-doubt start to infiltrate. It is amazing to learn what you are truly capable of when put under outrageous circumstances.  When my back is against the wall, I tend to perform better under pressure.

The idea of ‘faking it till I make it’ in the small business realm isn’t easy. Sure, repeating it over and over like a broken record helps; but for me, I need a little bit more than that. Here are my strategies that help me “fake it till I make it”.

  1. Act as if you know what you are doing. People who invest in you want confidence & assurance that you know what you are doing. Yes, for the most part, you are great in what you do; but in those moments when you are unsure of yourself, sometimes you have to play the part of the expert. Or maybe you have to believe that you can make that (unrealistic) deadline. In the end, sometimes you surprise yourself in what you can do  when you initially were unsure of your capabilities.
  2. Don’t be afraid to be wrong. Mistakes happen. Yes, there will be moments where you underestimate yourself. We’ve all been there where we over-committed (at least I know I have). It’s important to note that the minute you recognize that you have been in the wrong, apologize immediately and determine an action plan to rectify the situation. Everyone has been in a pickle at some point or another. The trick is: don’t make the same mistake with that same customer. If you’ve set out a modified plan, follow through with it; no ifs and or buts. And then forgive yourself after all is said and done.
  3. Learn from each opportunity. In all success or non-success moments, there is always something to be learned. Seize those moments of achievement; and replicate those steps in future opportunities. Celebrate those successes because each one is huge. For the latter moments, reflect on what that limitation was and try not to repeat it. If you fall & trip, get up and keep on trucking. Yes, falling smack down on your face can be humiliating; but there is nothing more humbling than falling & rising above that fall.
  4. Build credibility. All your successes will contribute to your credibility. All the positive feedback on what you do will build your integrity as a small business. The customers who show their loyalty through repeated involvement with you demonstrate your credibility. Track your progress and share your successes. When other (future customers) begin to hear about what you offer, your business is bound to expand.
  5. Take the time to learn & grow. There is always something to be learned. Whether its refining a skill, expanding you current repertoire of skills, or learning something new, you can only benefit and grow as a business when you enhance your knowledge-base.

As a (newbie) self-employed boss, the concept of “know no bounds” is really all about seizing all opportunities with an attitude of conquering it all despite any challenges that come your way.

For me, it’s eyes on the prize of building my small empire & exploring the craft world, while strutting through,  in my best outfit like I’m the boss (even in moments when I feel like I have no clue what I’m doing ).

Always me, SoireeFrills Co.

This week, I continue to be highly motivated by orders coming through my way. We are into week 3 into the new year; and the momentum that typically comes along with new year’s resolutions continue to carry me through.

Boss-in-training: No-no bounds

Don’t be afraid to fly

I love birds. Birds are a symbol of freedom. They seem so carefree when I see them up in the sky soaring above. If it’s one thing I want my girls to know, it’s teaching them to find their wings and to capitalize on spreading their wings.

I truly feel that people are meant to feel free in what they choose to do.

I recognize that teaching someone else to fly (obviously in a metaphoric sense) is scary, especially as a parent who sits on the other side of the fence when looking into raising their child. To fly is to risk falling; and falling means the risk of  hurting oneself. This essentially means when you allow someone to fly, you risk seeing that person fall. As a parent, you never want to see your child struggle, fail, or cry….but  just as there is a correlation between rain and rainbows, flying and falling go hand in hand like two peas in a pod. The risk of falling is quite high when one flies; but the goods that come with flying are that much more extraordinary…and I want them to find their extraordinary.

I want them to know that the world is theirs to explore, that there is nothing out of reach in this world. I want them to feel that life is an adventure worth taking risks. At the end of the day, who wouldn’t want to feel free & invincible like a bird?

Dear Elle and Enne,

I want you to be free just like the birds in the sky. The possibilities in life are endless if you take a chance on life and on yourself. You can do whatever you want (unless of course it’s to elope with a stranger, then you surely cannot do that). I want you to pursue your dreams. There is no such thing as impossible. Don’t let anyone tell you something is impossible…and if they do, I will be secretly cheerleading you to prove them wrong. Don’t be afraid to find your wings; don’t be afraid to fly.

 In your journey of growth, if and when there are moments that you fall, fail or lose your way, I will be right here to pick you up. If your wings ever need mending so that you can return back to flying, I will be there in a moment’s notice. The world is yours to explore.

Love, Mom

Be you; Do you. The rest will follow.

Boss: Know no bounds

Be you; Do you. The rest will follow!

Embrace you for you; embrace your style. Not too long ago, as I was starting up my small business, I would often peruse other stores and online businesses to see what was hot on the market. While there is a place to keep up with current trends, you can only be truly great (and genuine for that matter), if a project personifies you.

It is very difficult to do something and be passionate about something when it isn’t your style. It’s even more challenging to market your products when it is not in line with your vision. Branding your products, specifically if you are maker or a crafter, will be essential in marketing your merchandise/ crafts/ products.

So here I am being upfront and honest with who I am with you; and what my personal style is all about.

I’ve always loved colour and use of pattern. I love bohemian & funk style. If it’s bright, you know I’m all about it. Florals, yup!! My entire closet is full of florals. Geometric shapes; best believe it. Rocker chic, right on right on. Cutesy things, I’m all over it. Could it fit the 70s or 80s genre? Then for sure it’s my style.

Some people may see it as tacky, and for some, it may drive them up the wall when things seem “too busy”. Hearing that used to bug me. Over these years, I’ve come to terms that your style isn’t their style. How boring would that be if everyone was the same? Those who see your passion for what you do will see it in your work. And when you do great work, people ask you to do work for them. It has brought me great joy being a part of my customers’ celebrations through my creations. You will often see bright colours in my work…However, I will also tailor to people’s styles for their celebrations. There is nothing more that makes me happy when people tell me my stuff was “a great hit”.

For that, I am eternally grateful that I’ve learnt to love my personal style, do great work, and share that work with others willing to invest in me. Afterall, people who choose me to do their party décor, whether it’s their banners, backdrops, party favours, etc., could have picked someone else, but they invested in me. For that, I say thank you.

Do what you love, love what you do. Be you, and always do you. The rest will follow.

Always me, SoireeFrillsCo.

Boss-in-training: No-no bounds

Don’t feel the need to conform to the norm

I have always dressed both my daughters in bright colours from the time they were born to the present day. Sometimes their outfits are a bit much, especially when I see them around other kids who are dressed in ‘current trends’ and are wearing outfits that could have been featured on a trendy Instagram account. I remember one day feeling slightly embarrassed that my kids were in mismatched colourful outfits during a party and I remember clearly how I felt when it was pointed out to me (several times that day, I might add) how their pants and tops did not match.

A few weeks later, while getting my daughters ready for another party, the critique was ringing in my ears, which then prompted me to tell my (older) daughter that she needed to wear the black colour leggings with the bright patterned top because you surely can’t wear two bright pieces of clothing articles together. She was upset, because a few weeks ago, she wore something similar & she could not understand why all of a sudden I was telling she couldn’t. Needless to say, I argued with a 4 year old for 10 minutes before the argument ended. Can you guess who won?

It wasn’t me, I did not win. I spent some time reflecting afterwards on what had happened there. Where was this coming from? It then dawned on me; I was falling in that trap of being a people pleaser. Because I was made to feel embarrassed a few weeks back, I did not want a replay of those emotions. And perhaps a part of me was justifying my behaviours in that I did not want her to feel embarrassed. But you know what? On that day when I tried to make her switch outfits, she was so happy to pick out her outfit all by herself (like a big girl) & I remember her being the happiest kid amongst the other kids. She was laughing and running, and she reminded me of a free bird. She was comfortable in her own skin. And when I realized this epiphany, I was disappointed in myself. I have prided myself in being okay with being different all my life, yet here I was trying to conform my daughters to the norm.

Since that day, I allow my daughter to pick out her own outfits (but of course only intervene if she wants to wear that same flower girl dress for the millionth time that same week, lol) . Afterall, it is wonderful for them to have that autonomy for self-expression and allow them to explore who they want to be. It is amazing how much they already know what they like or do not like at the age of 4.

These kiddos teach me, and remind me, that what hits home for me as an adult, are relevant life lessons to kiddos who are also mini adults in the making.

Dear Elle and Enne,
The real life lesson here is that we are all different and we all have the right to be different. People are always going to judge and sometimes try to bring you down with what they think is right and what’s wrong. Sometimes you will love what’s in & what’s trendy. There will be moments when you have similar opinions from those around you. But there are going to be challenging times when what you like or think  is going to be vastly different from others. Embrace the differences; embrace what feels right to you. Those are the circumstances that will test, but define, your character.  If people try to make you feel bad, be strong & stay committed. Those that you love will love you for who you are, quirks and all.  Don’t feel the need to conform to the norm. You are brilliant the way you are in what you do and how you do.

Love,  Mom

New Year, Modified you

2017! New year, fresh start, new ventures to work towards your aspiring goals. People don’t typically have to wait until the new year to try something new or to jump start on an aspiration, however a new year rejuvenates and provide fuel for that engine waiting to be ignited….and I am certainly feeling ignited.

For years now, I have aspired to participate in the blogging world. This year, I am committing to blogging weekly about two  topics that I am very passionate about.

The first topic; “Boss: Know no bounds” will be about my insights and experience as an aspiring entrepreneur of a small craft business. Every week, I will be highlighting what motivated me throughout the week as it relates to my small business.

As many of you know, ‘building your empire’,so to speak, is no small feat; especially when you are a mom of two young children (both currently under the age of four), have another professional career during the week, have a household to run, & of course, have other life roles. It’s a juggling act, it’s literally a circus.

“Boss: Know no bounds” will feature my motivation throughout the week, what message resonated with me, & what lesson I learned.  It’ll be my lens into my journey of building my business  & how I keep going at it despite the challenges that come my way .

My second topic, “Boss-in-training: No-no bounds” will highlight lessons & perspectives I want to pass on to my two daughters. As a mother of two girls, I often sit and think at night (of course after they’ve gone to bed & I’ve had a moment to reset my brain) what main life lessons do I want them to know growing up; what personality traits do I hope for them: in order for them to thrive in this complicated world. When they are this little, all you want to do is hold on tight, protect them forever, and have them live in this ‘flowery bubble’. But we all know that isn’t reality. At some point, you have to let your kids develop their wings & let them fly. So as scary as it is as a parent to let your kids fly, just knowing that allowing them to fly & flourish is how they will thrive in life.

“Boss-in-training: No-no bounds” are life lessons that are important to me & what I’d love to teach my daughters.It will highlight the “dont’s” , which will then shift in the “do’s. This will document my advice for my girls on  how to be your own boss in their world.

In sharing my insights, I’m hoping this blog will inspire other entrepreneurs (that girl boss, lady boss, mister boss, boss man) & other moms raising their kiddos. Plus this blogosphere will be my platform in documenting the trials & tribulations I learn as I go in this wild adventure as an aspiring entrepreneur & mother.